Archive for May, 2006
All We Need Is Just A Little Patience.
Wednesday, May 31st, 2006I am not a patient person.
Well, most of the time I am not patient.
I am patient enough to let water boil so that I can make a cup of tea. I am patient enough to sit for twenty minutes so that my son can tie his own shoes (mother patience, although trying, is necessary). […]
Rich Mom Lady - repost.
Tuesday, May 30th, 2006We’re talking, Michelle and I, about real moms, and where ours went, and whether maybe we are sisters. I don’t think we are because her hair is curly and brown and mine is sort of reddish-blond and straight, and she has light green eyes and mine are dark blue. Sisters are supposed to […]
Dawn - repost.
Sunday, May 28th, 2006I went out for my walk today, earlier than usual, and everything was relatively quiet in the ‘hood. I have never been much of an early person, but lately it’s nice to see the morning; and since I am on a bit of a nostalgia kick it’s brought me back to a time in which […]
This Is Spinal Tap. repost.
Friday, May 26th, 2006I am laying on my left side, both hands squeezing those of the med student in front of me in a death grip, our knuckles pale white. I know I am hurting her and I don’t care. More med students stand behind her chair and in front of the flowers. The room seems too dim. […]
Sanitize The Wal-Marts.
Wednesday, May 17th, 2006I have just returned from the Mart of Wal. If you subscribe to the belief that the ghetto mecca is undesirable during a regular day, please don’t attempt to go anywhere near it at night, assuming you would like to retain any small shreds of your sanity (I don’t have to worry, as mine is […]
God Save the Drag Queens.
Monday, May 15th, 2006I have a long history of great relations with drag queens.
In my youth this used to freak me out, as if perhaps my tremendous height and particularly deep voice caused me to be mistaken for one of the gang, but I have since grown to realize that it’s just me, doing what I do, which […]
Venting.
Wednesday, May 10th, 2006You know, I am ready to run out of my front door in my underwear, my Ronald McDonald-ass red Jew-fro standing on end, screaming, “DOES JEN HAVE TO SMACK A BITCH?!”
Beceause really, I think I do.
Please excuse what will no doubt contain a whole fucking lot of profanity, mixed metaphors, double negatives, and other shit […]
The Fart.
Monday, May 8th, 2006I rarely fart.
I’m not being all, Oh, tee-hee, I am such a lady, my delicate little heinie is as quiet as Condoleeza Rice’s phone sex line, either. I just don’t do it.
With the way I talk about constipation you would think my innards would be a raging mass of gas production, wouldn’t you? […]
I Love Computers. - repost
Friday, May 5th, 2006Do you ever want to just drop-kick your monitor while screaming “FUCKING SHIT FUCK FUCK FUCKING SHIT!” and then do you ever want to pound your CPU with a hammer while continuing to kick the monitor and yelling, “GODDAMN FUCKING PIECE OF STUPID CRAP SHIT FUCK FUCK DAMN!!!”?
And then, do you ever want to take […]
