Zonk.
November 13th, 2006 by Kevin
I’m absolutely exhausted.
This is going to consist of a lot of boring medical crap, mostly just because I’m trying to wrap my head around some stuff. You’ve been warned.
I forget sometimes that I can’t go running around like a freak all weekend on very little sleep without reality bitchslapping me right back down to earth with a big, fat, pimp hand.
I had a wonderful time Saturday night with Bullshit, but ran on little sleep and wound up having a seizure Sunday morning and then ignoring that and going to the movies and going out for lunch with my friend B. and her mom anyway, resulting in my passing out cold on her parents’ stairs early in the evening.
Now I pretty much feel as if I’ve been hit by a truck.
Thankfully, though, my neuro is back in town early, and I am actually going to be able to see a doctor, most likely this week, and start getting off of the larger part of the medication that he prescribes me, which the cardiologist says will stop some of the falling down. Here’s hoping. I’m still crossing my fingers to not have to get a pacemaker.
All of this is a complete flip-flop, really. The neurologist was placing me on all sedative-type medications to stop what he thought were brain-based seizures and calm my brain, and now they’re trying to get me off all the crap to get my blood pressure up and avoid convulsions due to that.
Christ.
All I know is that I will be sofuckingglad to get off of the Topamax, the Dopamax, the what-was-my-phone-number-again, stupid-ass, mind-numbing, dumbass-creating brainfuck of a drug that has been the bane of my existence for the past few years. I hate it, and I’ll be happy to see it go, hopefully taking the fogheadedness it brought with it.
Four hundred milligrams of that shit a day, folks. It’s a wonder I can Spel mi oHn nAime.
One thing I am completely unclear on is whether the Fuckbrain is due to the Heartfuck, is part of the Heartfuck, or is completely unrelated to the Heartfuck. Because if the two are tied together and this means my headaches are going to start to abate and my eye could possibly start to improve, that would be great. I’m not going to hold my breath, but it would be great.
I know now that my nerve pain/numbness and occasional problems walking are going to remain due to the wonky discs in my back, but wouldn’t it be cool if that was the only thing that remained? And really, that too might be fixable with surgery if it ever gets to a point in which I can’t take it any more and am willing to go under the knife.
I’m not about to go flying out of here on a pink cloud because I’m well aware of what happened last time I got my hopes up too high, but maybe there is hope for all of this yet, and I’m trying to be cautiously optimistic.
My vision may be too far gone due to the state of my optic nerves, but I suppose stranger things have happened.
In other news, the Borat movie is hysterical. It is completely politically incorrect and occasionally gross and sometimes just plain fucking wrong, but I laughed my ass off and will probably be throwing out stupid Borat quotes for a long time.
Also, Girl Scout cookies are the fruit of the devil, and Girl Scouts themselves are little green-clad agents of Satan who take perverse joy in spreading them across the planet, creating billions of fat molecules every motherfucking second.
Take out a Girl Scout today. Run one over with your car, shoot one, hit one with a flamethrower, whatever. They must be stopped.
Happy Monday.
Fucking Thin Mints.
Cruel Irony wrote on 11/13/06 at 2:00 pm :
I love the new look!
trancejen wrote on 11/13/06 at 2:22 pm :
Thank you!
Bozoette Mary wrote on 11/13/06 at 2:28 pm :
You must send the Thin Mints to me, for I am the Savior (or Savorer) of the Thin Mints. (Keeping my cautiously optimistic fingers crossed for you, too.)
Lissa wrote on 11/13/06 at 3:02 pm :
Nuh-uh, lady, those girls are the source of my
crackCaramel Delites or Samoas or whatever anyone calls them. I keep those little angels safe and that’s the only time of year I relish every inch my ass grows wider.Biff Naked wrote on 11/13/06 at 3:11 pm :
Thin Mints Forever!!! Hey, does Bullshit know that he is called (with much affection) Bullshit?
trancejen wrote on 11/13/06 at 3:24 pm :
He knows.
warcrygirl wrote on 11/13/06 at 3:34 pm :
Thin Mints fresh from the freezer are divine, how can they be the froooo-its of the de-veeel?
trancejen wrote on 11/13/06 at 4:47 pm :
GOD they are SO GOOD frozen. SO FUCKING GOOD. ARGGGGGHHHHHHHHH
artgnome wrote on 11/13/06 at 4:48 pm :
I love da new look, great pic of you there, and I like all the white. With the red it’s getting me in the holiday spirit. heh.
I’m praying for your health, for healing and resolution. Or at least some good doctors who give a crap. K? k.
BE WELL. blessings, juni
Laughing Muse wrote on 11/13/06 at 6:16 pm :
So how many boxes did you buy?
Queen of the Winter Carnival wrote on 11/13/06 at 10:28 pm :
You know, I just so happen to work for the Girl Scouts. If you ever need a Thin Mints fix, any time of the year, you just let me know. Not that I’m an enabler or anything. Nope, not me.