Decaf.
May 25th, 2007 by Kevin
I’m off caffeine.
I read the PI sheets from the medications I’m currently taking - read them and did not toss them away with a roll of my eyes, this time - and have decided to follow them to the letter, taking the pills at the exact times recommended, no alcohol, no caffeine.
No alcohol is not a problem - boredom-inducing, maybe, but not a problem. No caffeine is proving to be very difficult. I have purchased decaf coffee and decaffeinated Diet Coke, both of which I previously viewed as two of the most stupid and useless products God ever made.
I think I was right. They don’t quite cut the mustard. I have been sucking both down in hopes that I could fool myself into believing I was quaffing caffeine, but apparently I am not quite that stupid. All I am doing is wasting more money than a gas-guzzling SUV driver by chugging it all down, not to mention spending a great deal of time in the john.
Maybe I am quite stupid after all.
I am tired at the cellular level. How on earth do people survive with no caffeine? I think I have yawned at least two hundred times today. I have tried to read, and the words keep swimming off of the page. Either this is brain damage from too many falls, or I simply do not have the wherewithal to stay awake unassisted.
Last night I had an unprecedented burst of psychotic energy and borrowed my neighbor’s Dirt Devil so that I could suck all the dust out of my dust-gobbling red velvet couch in the basement. I don’t know what it is about velvet that attracts such mounds of dust, but the thing is a massive bloodbath of allergens.
Three hours later I was still attacking the Oriental rug, corners and bookcases and under the bed with the tiny little hose attachment. I think I’m in love.
My current obsession is trying to figure out how I can use my heavy bag outside. (Assuming I’m ever in good enough shape to remain upright long enough to box.)
I thought about hanging it from the hangover-y part of the roof, but the roof crashing down would be a Very Bad Thing. I have commissioned my father to try to come up with some sort of rolling welded steel stand that could be rolled in and out of the garage. He loves inventing that sort of shit, and it would be perfect.
This would give me the chance to get a little fresh air with my exercise, and hopefully the J-Man would enjoy taking up the sport, too.
In other news, the weather is perfect. Please don’t disrupt it.
Happy Friday.
golfwidow wrote on 05/25/07 at 2:08 pm :
I did okay on two coffees yesterday (compared to my normal two pots before LUNCH) and a 3.5 ounce bottle of Korean red ginseng tonic. I wish I’d had that stuff last time I gave up caffeine. I’m going to try it again. I didn’t get a migraine or anything.
sdg wrote on 05/25/07 at 2:23 pm :
What about one of those rolling clothes hangers that you see in department stores? Or, if you have a deck, they generally have enough load bearing support to accomodate a heavy bag.
Katie wrote on 05/25/07 at 4:58 pm :
Ok 1) where did you get the ballet shoes and 2) stick with the no caffeine thing. It will take awhile but the nastiness should wear off. I have done it before!
Kizz wrote on 05/26/07 at 11:53 am :
I haven’t had caffeine in about a decade. I can’t speak for how it’ll affect you with the meds but I can say that for little unmedicated me (and my 2 liters of coke a day habit) I was tired for a while. Really super tired for maybe a week and kind of tired for probably a month. But then you get used to the new sleep patterns and stuff. Or you substitute sugar for the quick energy like I did and have to get yourself off that crutch too. You can do it, though, and, on some level, it’ll feel good.
trancejen wrote on 05/26/07 at 12:44 pm :
Ballet shoes = zappos.com
sugar = my only saving grace
Jennie wrote on 05/26/07 at 2:31 pm :
Hey! You sound like you’re doing better - that’s great! Giving up caffiene is a bitch but it does get easier.
I’m so glad you said something about your velvet couch and all the dirt it attracts. I recently bought a lighter color than I had and this time velvet (oh the grammer) slip cover for my couch and it is just COATED in cat fur. The other one barely showed any. Mystery solved. GRRRRR…
Kungfukitten wrote on 05/27/07 at 4:42 am :
I’m glad you’ve updated. I’ve been worried about you. Like crazy ass stalker worried about you. I know how you feel about caffeine, when I quit drinking coffee I couldn’t figure out how people ever got up in the morning. You might try stopping the coffee and stay with regular Diet Coke and then in a couple of weeks switching to caffeine free Diet Coke in the afternoon. It’ll be less of a jolt to the system. You need to scan the tattoo designs, I want to see them!
Lola wrote on 05/27/07 at 12:49 pm :
Gosh, thanks for the shout out in your last entry!
Anyway, I’m glad to hear that things seem to have gotten a little better in the past week or so. I also gave up the caffeine for a bit (well, almost a year) while I was nursing the boys and it pretty much sucked. So I can kind of sympathize.
Hope your enjoying the books, it was great to catch up and to see you again. Let’s do it again soon. Oh, and BS seems like a real keeper.
Fork wrote on 06/1/07 at 7:48 pm :
The caffeine-withdrawal will wear off in a week or two and you’ll feel a lot better than you did before. Don’t give up!
Now, if only I could make myself remember that when trying to quit smoking…
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