I am Channeling Erykah Badu.
September 29th, 2008 by trancejen
So Bullshit and I are here in my hospital room (that is room TS423, University of Chicago, send flowers and Diet Coke)-
(That really is my room number. So don’t stalk me, do send Diet Coke.)
(Seriously. I’m deprived. If readers sent me a single can of Diet Coke I would be so tickled. A mix CD to anyone who can pull that off.)
(Send flowers and I dance naked on your lawn.)
(I kid.)
A teeny little Korean lady just installed my head electrodes and leads and wrapped me up like the Mummy, or, if you prefer, someone getting in touch with her African heritage a la Erykah Badu.
Being adopted I really can’t say for sure that I don’t have any African heritage, but the whiteness of my skin makes it look highly unlikely.
Bullshit and I are both typing feverishly away on our laptops, thrilled that the room has wi-fi, because God forbid we should actually have to interact with each other. Bullshit is spending the night here with me tonight. We can’t have sex, though, because I’m being videotaped, and I refuse to contribute to the fat stack of University of Chicago porn I saw in the gift shop. Not with wires coming out of my head! I’m not looking my best.
I’m actually just bored, seriously jonesing for a cigarette (already), and slightly afraid. Afraid I’ll have monster seizures, afraid I won’t have any because all I’m doing is lying in bed and they’ll think I was faking or some shit. Afraid I’ll spend all my money on eBay.
The doctors I’ve met so far seem really nice, and there have been no Nurse Ratcheds.
So far, so good.
If you want to call me, e-mail me, and I’ll e-mail you the number.
Peace out.
Mo wrote on 09/30/08 at 10:40 am :
I’d like to call you and cheer you up! And, just chit-chat with you! My email is *points upwards to your cute little box that asks for every time*
K-dizzle wrote on 09/30/08 at 12:57 pm :
The best of luck to you. I am SURE you will perform properly! Seriously though, Be well my friend!
Lindsay wrote on 09/30/08 at 4:03 pm :
I hope that you’re feeling ok!
Christine wrote on 09/30/08 at 5:05 pm :
What an odd way to spend time together ;-). Seriously, I hope your visit is a short-lived one, with positive results. We’re all here for you!
Kim wrote on 10/1/08 at 11:18 pm :
It sucks you’re where you are, but I’m honestly very happy and relieved to hear from you and how things are going.
If I knew you’d be there long enough, I’d put Diet Coke in the mail tomorrow. I understand the unholy love for the crack-in-a-can all too well.
Bozoette Mary wrote on 10/2/08 at 6:12 pm :
I hope all is going well!
Lexi wrote on 10/2/08 at 7:26 pm :
I hope this hospital visit bodes well and brings relief of every kind. Keep the good spirits up.
dialzero wrote on 10/4/08 at 3:11 pm :
Hey there, I hope the hospital trip is fruitful.
This made me think of you:
http://current.com/items/89365020_target_women_number_two