Archive for the 'Heartfuck' Category
Open Letter To The Elderly.
Friday, March 9th, 2007Dear Old-Ass Damned Old People,
I know you’re old, and I do respect that. I know I’m going to be old as fuck one day too (with any luck), and that young punk-ass people with tattoos and nose rings (or eyeball rings, or whatever they’re into at that time) are probably going to roll their […]
OMG CEILING CAT IS WATCHING ME MASTURBATE
Tuesday, February 27th, 2007Thanks for your comments regarding the move. So far I’m sort of leaning toward Blogger (Nick, you have an e-mail coming), but I have not decided yet.
OK. So I live in a basement cave, right? We have established that. I live in a basement cave that used to be an unfinished […]
Fighting For My Right to Be Bitchy.
Sunday, February 18th, 2007I don’t feel that I’m a bitch, or surly, or overly possessive of a Shitty Sick Person attitude.
I try to keep it together most of the time, because isn’t that what we sick folk are expected to do?
If you’re chronically ill, you’re supposed to be graceful about it. You’re supposed to accept it […]
All the News That’s Fit To Spit.
Friday, February 2nd, 2007I have been in the throes of some heinous sort of snot-inducing, SARS-type virus. I blame the boyfriend entirely, protest though he may, because he has been hacking and snorting and making all sorts of charming noises for the past couple of weeks, and of course I need a patsy to pin this on.
Damn […]
Jen Did Not Overdose On Nog.
Thursday, January 4th, 2007I have been the victim of some cruel and horrible cable internet influenza that wormed its way into my phone line and wreaked havoc, causing my little computer box to become sick and take to its little computer bed for far too long a time.
I have dealt with this in the normal way, by swearing […]
If I Went To Med School, Maybe I’d Get This.
Tuesday, December 19th, 2006I was put back on the full dosage of the medication that was making me feel worse before because I’m still passing out.
I would like very much to gain entrance into the universe in which this makes sense, just for a few minutes, just so I can understand this for a moment so as to […]
Vicious Cycles.
Tuesday, December 12th, 2006You don’t even have to download yesterday’s song, folks. The brilliant Laura has informed me that you can bop on over to The Coup’s MySpace page and hear the song there.
That would be “Laugh/Love/Fuck”, in case you forgot.
Your welcome.
It is so cold and dry in this house that I feel as if I am […]
The Festive Christmas Zit.
Monday, December 11th, 2006Occasionally I get so tickled by an album - whether new or old -that I have to listen to it ten thousand times, and
this week that album is Tegan and Sara’s So Jealous. Give it a listen.
A close runner up is Sufjan Stevens’s Illinoise.
It’s cute little indie rock week! Cut your own hair […]
Hork.
Thursday, December 7th, 2006My second hospital roommate had the SARS and may have possibly been schizophrenic.
My last night in the hospital, at about ten o’clock at night, I was informed that I would be receiving a new roommate. Cool, I thought. I was sick of reading the back issues of US News and World Report my […]
Sonic Booms.
Wednesday, December 6th, 2006My first roommate on the cardiac floor of the hospital produced the loudest farts I have ever heard in my entire life.
Allow me to qualify that statement by reminding you that I have five stepbrothers and have heard farts representative of what I previously believed to be every pitch possible, from the thundering rumble of […]
